If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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