so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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