Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
