Pappa wants mamma naked
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
