would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
