If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
