so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
