last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize