Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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