After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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