The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I would ride that face into the sunset
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