He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
