the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
