I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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