My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize
