god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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