A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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