Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize
