Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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