lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Quick, to the slutcave!
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
