You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
