ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
