don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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