some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
