that's an acceptable place to lick
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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