the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
You dont lie about slip and slides
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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