So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
