I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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