So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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