I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize