Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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