Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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