I can tuck mytits in my pants
I want to walk on stilts...naked
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
