is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Randomize
