i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
