I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
