so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Randomize
