the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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