OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
