I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
