I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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