Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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