Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
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