Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
