K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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