you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
