Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
