At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
