i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Randomize
