margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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